Snapshot #212

I own a couple of pairs of Spanx. They’re great for containing, smoothing, and camouflaging parts of my body that aren’t all that firm anymore, like my waistline and my abdomen. I don’t wear them often, reserving them for special occasions. It’s not that I don’t want to look svelte all the time, it’s just that I live in the Sunshine State where more layers equal more discomfort.

So when I saw these new offerings from Spanx in a Tallahassee department store I did a double take:

Am I supposed to wear these with my tank tops?

I think I’ll call this, I Know I Need Them, but No Thanks, Spanx.

Peace, people (and seriously, I should cease wearing tank tops!)

Thanks Spanx

My attention span’s grown shorter
With time’s relentless trudge.
Predictably, my waist has widened
As have my hips and stately bust.

With no hesitation have I turned
To undergarments stout and bold
For Spanx has kept my jigglies firm
While years have turned my assets old.