Month: June 2021

And Now, A Word from Our Sponsor

Later today, I’m getting a lesson on creating a Facebook ad for my books from my friend, author, Lori Roberts Herbst. Lori has, so far, published the first two books in her Callie Cassidy Mystery Series: Suitable for Framing and Double Exposure. (Links below). Both books are a lot of fun with believable, likable characters and plots with enough twists and turns to keep a reader guessing until the very end.

I hope Lori knows what she’s getting into, I’m fairly obtuse when it comes to all things related to technology and marketing. My efforts at marketing my own books have teetered between annoying and really annoying. Hopefully, Lori can guide me into the realm of ‘much less annoying.’

Wish us luck. And consider investing in anti-anxiety meds. Demand may rise exponentially during today’s tutoring session.

Peace, people!

Check out Lori’s books. Both are available from Amazon and on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited.

http://Suitable for Framing (Callie Cassidy Mysteries) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1736259318/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_K87038Y3QF8CQM40ZJ1X

http://Double Exposure (Callie Cassidy Mysteries) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1736259334/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_WNB0MWV8NFXJ37CDV0JS

One Sheep, Two Sheep

Thanks to growing up on the wisdom embodied in Bugs Bunny cartoons, when I cannot sleep I often resort to counting sheep.

I’ll picture a line of sheep backed up for miles, or acres, I suppose. As the next in line approaches the fence he or she gets a running start and usually makes it over the barrier. Sometimes, though, a sheep will stumble or catch a hoof on the top rail, and soon all the other sheep are laughing and pointing and offering advice, often saying, “Baa! Baa!” Which loosely translates to “Ewe should have stopped and asked directions!” Even though the sheep wasn’t lost, just clumsy. Sheep aren’t the smartest animals in the barnyard, after all.

Instead of counting leaping sheep I’m now offering them lessons in compassion. I relate the story of the Good Samaritan, but my words fall on deaf ears and my frustration grows and now I’m more wide awake than when I started the process.

Tonight, though, I had an epiphany—what if the sheep aren’t in a single file line? What if they aren’t jumping a fence? What if they’re all just chomping on grass, scattered about the countryside like so many cotton balls on a blanket? This scenario has possibilities! Now, if I could convince them to stay in one place this might just work.

“Hey, you, get back here! The fence is off limits!” Oh well, it was worth a try. Maybe I should count cotton balls instead.

If only.

Peace, people!

Google Saves the Day

Almost every evening some question arises that neither Studly Doright nor I can answer. We’ll bicker back and forth, offering our own answers, but our good friend Google is always called on in the end to settle the matter.

Some nights the question in question revolves around the name of an actor and/or what other roles we’ve seen them in. Studly is much better at this than I am, but we always ask Google in the end.

On Sunday evening as we watched the Travelers Championship golf tournament a commercial played and I turned to Studly. “I believe that’s Bob Dylan singing in this Traveler’s insurance commercial.”

Now Studly pays little to no attention to music. He knows all the words to one song—“Happy Birthday”—but that didn’t keep him from weighing in.

He frowned. “No it’s not Dylan. The voice isn’t gravelly enough.”

We argued for a good ten minutes before I held up my phone. “We’ll see. I’m asking Google.”

Sure enough I was right. Damn, but it feels good to say that. I only wish it happened more often.

https://www.ispot.tv/ad/nlFo/travelers-a-better-tomorrow-song-by-bob-dylan

Peace, people.

Sensory Overload

On Saturday afternoon I was minding my own business, sitting on the couch, and playing Words with Friends on my phone. It began as a peaceful activity. Then others intruded on my nirvana.

Studly Doright had a golf game going on the television while simultaneously watching a YouTube video on some aspect of a 1956 or ‘57 Cushman scooter he’s working on for a friend. The cat was engaged in an attempt to free a trio of small balls from a toy.

Gracie is the best kind of crazy.

Between the tv, the video, and the racket the cat was making, I had to have a glass of wine. My coping skills might be a little thin, but at least I have good taste.

Not my glass; not my wine, but isn’t it lovely?

Peace, people!

Revising isn’t for Wussies

A couple of weeks ago I sent my novel, Wedding at the Happy Valley Motor Inn and Resort, off to trusted beta readers. It was an extremely raw version of the novel, and it came as no surprise that my readers discovered the book was chock full of blunders and bewildering plot holes.

So now I’m engaged in righting all the wrongs. It’s a tedious process, but I’m going to confess that there’s something satisfying about solving the problems I put into play in the first place.

Some issues are fairly easy to work through thanks to the Search feature on my computer program. Apparently my characters like to say “roust” way too often and if head ducking was a crime, all of my characters would be in jail by the end of the book.

Other problems are structural in nature and require a delicate touch, so I’m treading lightly. Oh, who am I kidding? I’m taking a sledgehammer to that stuff. Chop, chop baby.

Look for my books on Amazon and on Kindle and Kindle Unlimited!

Mayhem at the Happy Valley Motor Inn and Resort https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08PDRH2Q9/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_T8SXRR2G0J32FFXVTR6W

The Cowboy and the Executive: A West Texas Romance https://www.amazon.com/dp/B095BVSF3L/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_CJYF0023HS4DEEE6HZXJ

Peace, people!

Hand in Glove

For Father’s Day, Studly Doright received a gift card from our daughter for one of his favorite motorcycle accessory retailers and wasted no time in placing an order. He selected some cool looking touring gloves. Today the gloves arrived.

They came with an instruction pamphlet.

That amused me. Of course, Studly refused to read the pamphlet even though I urged him to do so. If things go awry, he can’t blame me.

Peace, people.

In This Corner…

I’m hoping my readers aren’t yet weary of stories from my recent adventure at the Tallahassee airport because I have one last tale to tell.

To recap, on Sunday morning I took my granddaughter to the airport to catch a flight back to Illinois. We arrived early because I was a nervous ninny about the whole “I’m sending a 16-year-old off to Chicago in a big hunk of metal during a raging thunderstorm” thing.

We made it through security with only a little hiccup—apparently McKayla had a bag chock full of coins stowed away in her carry-on. The x-ray machine couldn’t quite discern what was going on and a physical search was called for, but soon, the problem was resolved and we were clear to enter the gate area.

Immediately upon leaving security we encountered a woman I took to be right around my age. She was shorter than me and her red hair was carefully coiffed. She had friendly eyes above her mask. It was fairly obvious that she wasn’t a regular flyer. She was looking around and we walked by her just as she dropped her phone.

Me, being me, I bent down to retrieve the phone, whereupon she let go of her small suitcase. It fell over and the handle hit the top of my head. I’m not going to lie, it hurt, but I think I hid that well—I only cried a tiny bit.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” she said as I handed her the phone. “Thank you.”

“It’s fine,” I said picking the suitcase up by the offending handle.

When she took it from me, she bobbled her phone again and we both reached for it, bumping heads.

We both got a case of the giggles to the horror of my granddaughter. I said, “I think I’ve just met my travel twin!”

She laughed and thanked me again and we retired to opposite corners. The bell never rang for round two.

Peace, people!

Kindle Unlimited

I’m not the savviest author on the planet. I seem to do everything upside down and backwards. It took me months after publishing my first novel to build author pages on Amazon and Facebook. And I have yet to figure out the intricacies of creating a Facebook ad. I’ve begun to believe I’m not the brightest crayon in the box.

But today, with the help of my editor and cover artist, Rachel Carrera, I made my books available on Kindle Unlimited. Now, you may ask, what exactly is Kindle Limited?

Q: What is Kindle Unlimited? (I’m so glad you asked)

A: Kindle Unlimited is a service that allows you to read as much as you want, choosing from over 2 million titles, thousands of audiobooks, and up to three select magazine subscriptions. Explore new authors, books, and genres from mysteries and romance to sci-fi and more. You can read on any device. It’s available for $9.99 a month and you can cancel anytime.

Pretty cool, eh? As much as I read I definitely should invest in this service. Studly Doright would approve.

The Cowboy and the Executive: A West Texas Romance https://www.amazon.com/dp/B095BVSF3L/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_WTH1957550AR4JZGE521

Mayhem at the Happy Valley Motor Inn and Resort https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08PDRH2Q9/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_4VT8N5DJSEZ6EB57193K.

Peace, people!

Late to the Gate

On Sunday morning I accompanied my 16-year-old granddaughter to the airport to catch a flight home to Illinois. I didn’t leave the airport until her plane was in the air just in case they had to return to the gate.

After the plane pulled away from the gate a harried looking couple came running to the desk. The man was frantic, calling “Where’s the agent?”

He pointed at the plane on the tarmac, looked at me, and asked, “Is that the flight to Charlotte?”

“Yes, sir,” I said.

“Where’s the gate agent?”

I shrugged.

The woman remained calm while her traveling companion raged. “We’re late. We’ll have to take a later flight,” she said.

“But it’s right there!” He said, pointing out the window again.

The gate agent returned to angry demands. “You need to have that plane open up.”

“I’m sorry sir, but once the doors are closed the plane can’t return unless there’s a mechanical problem or the flight is cancelled.”

The man strode up and down the terminal aisle letting the few people still hanging around know how he’d been wronged. When the flight took off he finally realized that he wasn’t going to get his way and slumped into a seat.

Meanwhile, the woman calmly rebooked their flight to Key West through Charlotte, N.C., and checked their luggage.

I left, but couldn’t help wondering how the remainder of their vacation went. I’ll bet she’ll have a good time, regardless. Him, not so much.

Maybe a piña colada would help.

Peace, people.

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