Tag: florida

What Goes BOOM-BOOM in the Middle of the Night?

Studly Doright and I met our daughter and her family at an airport in Orlando yesterday. They’re spending today with us at a hotel in Cocoa Beach before boarding a cruise ship from Port Canaveral. I’ve tried to get myself included as a chaperone for the trip, but so far have had no luck. It didn’t help that I came down with a case of food poisoning last night and puked in the parking lot of the hotel. Now no one wants to take me along. Not even Studly.

There was some excitement around 2:43 this morning when an incredibly loud double sonic boom rattled the windows of our room. Grandson Garrett and I rushed out to the balcony to see if we could get a glimpse of the rocket as it broke away from the earth’s atmosphere. For one weird moment we stared in rapt attention at an extra tall flag pole, thinking it was the tail of the rocket’s trajectory. Sick as I was it made me giggle when we realized that the pole was stationary.

Then I returned to the bathroom where I continued to retch. Good times.

I think I feel better this morning. At least I can now identify a flag pole.

Peace, people!

The Mark of a Good Donut…

…Is the distance a person will drive in order to buy one.

Studly Doright and I drove about an hour to have donuts at Johnson’s Donuts in Perry, Florida, this morning, but that was nothing. A couple from Gainesville, a two hour drive, came in just because someone told them that Johnson’s donuts were better than Krispy Kreme. They ordered one of everything. We didn’t stick around to see what they thought, but they sure had big smiles on their faces.

Studly and I had donut holes, hot donut holes. Well worth the drive.

Peace, people!

It’s Been A While

There’s a hurricane headed our way. They’re calling it Hurricane Ian—a small name for what has the potential to be a big storm.

It’s been a while since we’ve had a such a storm, and we might’ve become a bit complacent around here. But I remembered to buy a family pack of Little Debbie oatmeal cookies and enough bottled water to get us through a couple of weeks just in case there’s an extended interruption in the water supply.

We’ve packed “go” bags, in the eventuality that the storm becomes a brute, but we’re hoping it’ll weaken as it nears. Best case scenario would be for it fizzle out before it does too much damage anywhere.

Good vibes appreciated.

Peace, people.!

Fall, Y’all

Fall is my jam. It’s the best of the seasons. Hands down. Or should I say, leaves down.

The sad thing is, here in Tallahassee, autumn is slow to arrive. Leaves remain a stubborn green and they stick to the trees like glue.

Now, I’m glad I live here in the land of three seasons: Summer, Summer Light, and That Odd Cool Spell Of Indeterminate Length, but sometimes I grow envious of places where the trees put on a regular fashion show with their audaciously bold oranges and reds and yellows. Here we get green and an occasional brown. Yay.

Growing up in the panhandle of Texas I became accustomed to some slight color changes in September. I loved riding my bike through crunchy yellow leaves, while pretending they were the bones of my enemies. I was an odd child.

But in school our teachers would hang paper leaves all over the classroom in colors I assumed weren’t true to life. Red leaves? Purplish leaves? No way. But then I grew up and for a brief time, lived in Illinois where I saw these colors in the wild and I wanted to capture them and take them home with me along with snazzy pine cones.

I made decorations with them and placed them on my dining table then realized there were bugs in the pine cones and we had to call an exterminator. Still, they were pretty til the very end.

Oh Fall. I love you so.

Peace, people!

Florida Man Works at Walgreens

I met him today. That epically incompetent human known as Florida Man. He was working the cash register at Walgreens and when I finally made it to the front of the line I asked him where a specific product could be found.

He shrugged.

“Can’t you look that up on an inventory list?” I asked.

“I never heard of that product. Maybe try the pharmacy.”

I walked back to the pharmacy where a very nice pharmacist waited on me. When I asked about the product she said, “Oh, yes. We have that, but it’s not with the pharmaceuticals. Let me show you.”

She left her section and walked with me to the item I was searching for. I thanked her and went back into the cashier’s line.

Florida Man looks at my item and says, “See, I told you it was in the pharmacy.”

“No sir. The nice pharmacist led me to your part of the store. It was on aisle one.”

“Hm. Well, I never stocked it.”

Now, this is where r go weird. He rang my product up, then asked, “Would you like to donate to runaway children with Alzheimer’s?”

I said, “That makes absolutely no sense. Children don’t get Alzheimer’s except in extremely rare cases of rapid premature aging.”

“That’s what it says on the box of red noses. For the benefit of runaway children with Alzheimer’s”

I looked at the box filled with red rubber clown noses. “Sir, these are given in exchange for donations to fight childhood poverty. Not for runaway children with Alzheimer’s.”

“Maybe they meant autism. Runaway children with autism. That’s who the red noses benefit. Do you want to donate?”

“Oh good grief. Sure. Just read the box before you misrepresent the purpose of the red noses again.”

As I left the store, I heard him ask another customer, “Do you want to donate to runaway children with Alzheimer’s?”

Florida Man, no doubt.

Peace, people.

The Hunter Becomes the Prey

Cat Gracie discovered a luckless lizard in the house yesterday and quickly let the poor critter know who was boss.

Listen here, lizard…
This house ain’t big enough for the both of us.

My attempts at rescuing the little guy were futile. I’d pick him up and Gracie would snatch the other end. I’d let go to prevent a tug of war, not wanting or needing to witness the decapitation of a reptile in my den.

But the lizard had a game plan:

I’ll show you, cat. Take that!
The lizard was firmly attached to a slender white whisker.

Gracie scraped the lizard off her face and backed away with a look of disbelief, allowing me to scoop the lizard up and take it outside where it played dead for quite some time. Well, to be honest, it might not have been playing, but it’s no longer in the spot where I left it. Whether it left of its own volition and under its own power is a mystery. I’m going to choose to believe it went on to live a productive life.

Peace, people!

A Stroll Through Dorothy P. Oven Park

On Saturday morning I rose early and drove across Tallahassee to stroll around a Christmas craft fair at Dorothy P. Oven Park. I didn’t buy anything, but I enjoyed the misty morning while wandering around the expansive grounds of this beautiful park. I’m not the greatest photographer, but maybe you can get an idea of how lovely this place is.

Peace, people.

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