Tag: humor

bravery behind the barrier

A flump flump of great wings conveyed our visitor across the lake to the intense scrutiny of two ordinary housecats.  

“Oh,” said Scout, “if only we could climb through this screen you would make a fine dinner.”

“Two dinners, maybe three,” added Patches, who was better at estimating portions than her sister.

The visitor surveyed them with cold amusement. 

  
“Good luck with that, you silly house animals.”

And with that he flew away.

Note: Neither of the blue heron pictures were taken by me. I found them on Pinterest but was unable to find a credit. My own heron would not stay in one place long enough for me to snap. I guess he didn’t care for the fame and fortune being featured in my blog my bring him. His loss.

A Quick Story Behind the Selfie

Yesterday I wrote about attending a campaign rally for Hillary Clinton at which former President Clinton spoke. I was an early early EARLY bird and had a front row spot. I’d like to say front row seat, but those were off to one side and reserved for local VIPs.

Given the time I stood in line along with time spent in the actual event I stood for about five hours yesterday. But it was so worth it.

Immediately following the event former President Clinton made his way around the barrier, stopping to shake hands with everyone within reach and graciously posing for pictures with anyone who asked. 

When he got to me, a world famous camera klutz, I decided to just shake his hand since I couldn’t do that AND snap a quick selfie. It would have to be enough. 

But the young man on the other side of me showed me his photo and I must have made some utterance of envy or dismay, for William Jefferson Clinton, 42nd President of these United States, took two steps back to me and WHISPERED IN MY EAR these momentous words, “What did you say?”

Yes! That happened. And I was flustered, but managed to say, “Oh, my friend was able to get a great selfie and I’m feeling jealous!”

And just like that he posed with me.

  
Yes, it’s a horrible photo of me–Ms. Psychedelic Funhouse 1956, but what a story, right? 

Peace, people. And Vote. 

Caution on a Windy Night

The evening ended on a high note. A C, I believe. When the applause faded into 

murmurs and restless rustlings I found myself in the midst of a jubilant crowd, 

jockeying for position to exit the venue. 

A seemingly endless series of stairs climbed up and up, testament to the 

quality of my third row seat. By the time I’d made my way to the top I was winded, weak in the knees.

Across a carpeted foyer and into the night, I inched along, part of a slowly stampeding 

herd. Around me, talk swirled of late dinners and night caps, of romantic 

assignations and illicit rendezvous.

The doors opened onto a blustery night. Jackets quickly donned against the chill 

could not dampen the anticipation in the air. And I? I threw caution to the wind and 

ordered two donuts at the bakery next door. 

Walking on the wild side.

  

Tree Heaven

 I guess I’m responsible for thousands of smiling trees. I wonder how they feel about e-readers? Relief? Survivor’s Guilt?  
Peace, people. 

Just Funny

Disclaimer: This is just a joke. Any similarities to my own sex life or lack thereof should not be construed. 

 

Things That Make You Go Hmmm

I’m just going to let this sit here for a bit:

  
Peace, people!

Word to the Wise

 I sent Studly Doright this message in an email. Let’s see if he can pull off the jump back “no” move to my satisfaction.
Peace, people! 

A Pickle for Your Thoughts

a pickle for your thoughts
i like the way that sounds
for if one takes a pickle
and divides it into rounds
the sum of all its parts
you see is greater then by far
than one single copper penny
that under any circumstance
shouldn’t be eaten from a jar.

  
Peace and pickles, people!