Politics: The Lighter Side

I have to admit this political season in the United States is getting to me. One cannot turn on the TV without encountering a nasty story or stories about this candidate or the other. 

On social media one might scroll through dozens of political memes before encountering even one cute kitten video, and weren’t cute kittens the reason social media was invented? 

I’m guilty of posting the political stuff on my Facebook page. Even though there is absolutely no one on my friends’ list who doubts my political leanings I am compelled to seek out and share that one photo that just might make everyone, even obstructionists like senate majority leader Mitch McConnell, change their minds and see things my way.

Can you imagine? The phone rings, 

“Hello?” I say.

“Ms. Noyes, this is senate majority leader Mitch McConnell.”

“No effing way!”

“Yes, it’s me. Surprise!”I can hear the smile and goodwill in his voice.

“Look,” he continues, “I want you to know that SCOTUS meme you posted…it really made me reexamine my position. Now, not only am I going to urge members of my party to visit with the President’s nominee, but I’m going to suggest they give him a down vote so Mr. Obama can nominate a true Liberal to the court.”

“Well, it’s about time you saw the error of your ways. Would you now please ask jackassinpoughkeepsie to stop trolling me online?”

“Sure! Sure! Anything for someone as politically astute as yourself.”

Something occurs to me, “Say Mitch, you know if you go this route with the Supreme Court nominee the National Rifle Association is going to pull its support so quickly that not only will your head spin, but the heads of your children and your children’s children will look like multi-colored tops orbiting the equator.”

“No worries! I’ve stockpiled the um, donations the NRA has made to my campaign for years, so I’m set for life. For several lives, actually.”

“Good to know, Mitch. So I’m pretty busy. I need to get back to scouring the web for cute cats. I hear there’s a great video showing them jumping out of boxes.”

“Okay! Hey, keep up the good work. You really made me see the light.”

“‘Bye Mitch.”

“Goodbye Ms. Noyes.”

My imaginary conversation with Mitch made me do some soul searching. What if, instead of posting serious political memes on my Facebook page I looked for the lighter side, the Pollyanna version of politics. So with that thought I give you the following. Both sides will get skewered:

Truly. Hitler might be surprised at all of the candidates, left and right, who’ve been compared to him.
My point….
See, I’m being kind-ish.
Hadn’t seen this one before!
Mrs. Clinton does field some odd questions.
Now, this is clever!
Sing it!
Kasich was the only one I had to struggle to find anything even remotely funny about. Kasich, the only moderately sane GOP candidate.

My personal favorite:

But, honestly, wouldn’t we all rather see this?


And as always, Peace, people! 

A Quick Story Behind the Selfie

Yesterday I wrote about attending a campaign rally for Hillary Clinton at which former President Clinton spoke. I was an early early EARLY bird and had a front row spot. I’d like to say front row seat, but those were off to one side and reserved for local VIPs.

Given the time I stood in line along with time spent in the actual event I stood for about five hours yesterday. But it was so worth it.

Immediately following the event former President Clinton made his way around the barrier, stopping to shake hands with everyone within reach and graciously posing for pictures with anyone who asked. 

When he got to me, a world famous camera klutz, I decided to just shake his hand since I couldn’t do that AND snap a quick selfie. It would have to be enough. 

But the young man on the other side of me showed me his photo and I must have made some utterance of envy or dismay, for William Jefferson Clinton, 42nd President of these United States, took two steps back to me and WHISPERED IN MY EAR these momentous words, “What did you say?”

Yes! That happened. And I was flustered, but managed to say, “Oh, my friend was able to get a great selfie and I’m feeling jealous!”

And just like that he posed with me.

Yes, it’s a horrible photo of me–Ms. Psychedelic Funhouse 1956, but what a story, right? 

Peace, people. And Vote. 

How Cool is This?

Last night I opened my email to find a letter from the Hillary Clinton campaign:

Without hesitation I clicked on the red RSVP now button and received a follow up email.

I was so excited I barely slept last night. Because I wasn’t familiar with the venue I got up extra early. Thanks to my GPS I was at the site a good two hours before the event.

The reward for my hyper punctuality came when I scored a front row spot. 

The crowd of like-minded folks chatted congenially while waiting over an hour after taking our places.

I tried to take a panoramic photo of the crowd inside the center, but failed miserably. Thus you get some random crowd shots from outside.

Several local dignitaries spoke, and then William Jefferson Clinton was introduced to raucous applause.

 Not long into his speech, former president Clinton’s notes fell from the podium. He never missed a beat, just toed them out of his way.

After speaking in his mix of down home and politically savvy style, all the time reminding us why Hillary should be our choice in tomorrow’s primary election, Mr. Clinton left the stage to shake hands with as many people as possible.

Remember that first row spot I found? It paid off:

Oh I wish I were a better selfie taker!

Go vote tomorrow if you live in Florida or Illinois, or any other state holding its primary. 

Peace, people!