Stars and Gripes

it isn’t easy being red,
white, and blue
sometimes we’re a target
other times we’re ridiculed
and now that we are growing
outside of old constraints
many of our own folks are
lodging new complaints.

they say we’ve wandered,
become too secular
but our founding fathers
were quite particular
refusing even then to
name a national faith
knowing well the tyranny
that lay along that path.

for if we honor only
Christian ideals
on government buildings
and official seals
then how can we expect
those of other creeds
to be willing taxpayers
when we ignore their needs?

  
Peace, people!

Everything Goes Better with Coke

One of Studly Doright’s coworkers, Mr. Z, found this beautiful piece of rusty history on Craigslist.

A little elbow grease
 
The asking price was $1100. Mr. Z really wanted it, but didn’t have anyplace to put it. Mr. Z decided Studly needed it for his new shop.

“No way!” said Studly. “I can buy a small fridge for $400.” 

A couple of weeks later Mr. Z told Studly the seller had come down to $600, but Studly remained steadfast.

Mr. Z remained in contact with the seller who was becoming more anxious to sell the machine. Finally he agreed to Studly’s price, and we are now the owners of a 1961 model Vendo56 Coca Cola machine. 

  
I can’t wait to stock it with Summer Shandy and Blue Moon!

To Drive or To Fly?

To say I am a logistics dunce is an understatement. Creating schedules, arriving at informed decisions around dates and times, brings on a headache every time. 

I stand in awe of those who fit together master schedules for schools, making sure each child in every class in every grade gets the required amount of time for the core subjects as well as physical education, music, library, and art, and builds in time for lunch and a recess as well. I’ve watched the process and trust me, it’s incredibly difficult. Never did I complain about scheduling lest someone hand the job over to me. 

But I digress. My current problem is trying to figure out whether it’s more cost efficient to drive or to fly to my daughter’s home in Illinois. If I were working it’d be a no-brainer. I’d need to fly to cut down on lost time at work. But, that’s not an issue.

Help me figure this out:

Flights: The lowest priced flights start at $456, but they have multiple connections. I hate multiple connections.

Driving: The distance from Havana, FL, to Rapid City, IL, is 1004.6 miles. Let’s call it an even grand.

My car averages 27 miles per gallon.

Studly and I used all of our hotel points on our last vacation, and I’ll need to stay two nights on the road. Let’s say I’ll spend about $120 per night.

If I choose my meals carefully I can eat for an average of $10 per meal. If I eat 10 meals on the road that’s $100. Let’s add in some snacks and call it $130.

Have I left anything out? 

There’s no prize for figuring out my best option, and I’ll most likely do what I want anyway, but if this stuff turns you on, go for it!

Peace, people!

  

Why I Write

  
I came across this on a friend’s Facebook page this morning and thought, “YES!”

How often have I heard, “Oh you write a blog. Do you make any money?” Or, after reading one of my blog posts, “You should be a writer!”

Well, I am. Just because I don’t have a book deal doesn’t mean I’m not a writer.

I wouldn’t know how to go about being a published author any more than I know about performing heart surgery. I don’t write to be published. I write to rescue that abandoned puppy. Sometimes I am that puppy. 

And I don’t perform open heart surgery because people would die. As far as I know, my writing hasn’t killed a single person. This week, anyway.

Steps

Clutching her handbag tightly in her left hand, Mary Riley gripped the rail at the top of the steps outside St. Vincent’s with her right. For the hundredth time that winter she wondered why she hadn’t requested communion be brought to her home. And for the hundredth time she smiled to herself, knowing how much she looked forward to Father Mark’s homilies and the feeling of belonging she received from attending mass.

Although a chilly wind swept across the steps they were clear of snow and ice, yet Mary knew the three sets of four steps could be treacherous for one her age. Just last fall her friend Ruth had taken a tumble on the last two steps and broken a hip. That same Ruth who’d once raced her to the top of the steps so many years before had never recovered from her accident and they’d buried her two days before Thanksgiving.

Mary stopped to rest on the first landing from the top, looking back to see Father Mark visiting with a young couple. He gave her a wave when he saw her standing there. 

“Mary, do you need a hand?” he asked.

“No Father, I’ve got this. Just remember your promise.”

He smiled, “Of course, but we’ve got years yet.”

She hadn’t wanted to like this young priest. He’d come in and stirred things up after Father Thomas left the diocese ten years ago. But Father Mark’s heart had shown through and soon he had revitalized the old church, bringing in new families and making everyone think about social justice.  

Just last week she’d made him promise to officiate at her funeral, fearing that he’d be moved to another parish and forget all about her. If she and Robert had been blessed with a son she’d have liked him to be like Father Mark. 

Of course Robert might not have liked the priest’s liberal views; he’d always been so conservative. But he was practical, as well. After both their older girls had found themselves in a family way while still in high school he’d instructed Mary to take their youngest, Regina to the family planning clinic uptown. “They’re breeding like rabbits!” he’d ranted. 

She shook her head ruefully, thinking of how she’d changed after Robert’s passing. He’d died of a heart attack months before Father Thomas left and had never known the younger priest. 

Robert had been a good man, Mary knew, continuing her descent, if a bit controlling. She’d never have gotten so involved in Father Mark’s peace protests had Robert still been alive. What would Robert have made of her striding around in slacks, of all things, singing anti-war songs? 

At the second landing Mary leaned heavily on the railing. She could clearly picture standing there with Robert posing for pictures after their wedding. He’d been so strong and handsome, his black Irish charm devastating. It was right there he’d swept her up to carry her to his Buick. Of course she hadn’t weighed much back then, but oh! It still made her heart beat a little faster to think of him carrying her down those last few steps.

Ruth and the other girls had been quite envious. But then Ruth had gone off to university and before long had started teaching in public school. Ruth had never married and sometimes Mary had envied her friend’s freedom. 

“The grass is always greener,” she mused aloud.

Getting her third wind, Mary pushed against the railing and carefully placed her foot on the next step. There was a little scuffed out place there where she always feared losing her footing. Almost to the bottom, just three steps to go, she looked up, surprised to see her Robert standing at the bottom looking just like he had on the day they’d wed.  “Well,” Mary sighed.

She looked back up to see Father Mark still visiting with parishioners.  With a smile she acknowledged he’d be keeping his promise to her sooner than he’d thought.

“What’s the smile for, my Mary?” Robert asked.

“I’m just thinking you could’ve met me at the top of these steps,” she laughed. 

William Despard Hemphill, Clonmel, County Tipperary

One of the best blogs out there by my Irish friend. Read more at inesemjphotography.com

inese's avatarMaking memories

Clonmel

Clonmel is one of my favorite towns in County Tipperary – a place rich of history, and surrounded by beautiful landscapes. If you travel Ireland and are interested in photography, it is a place to visit for many reasons.

In 1840 an instruction manual in the use of the daguerreotype was offered by the Dublin Mechanical Institute and the natural Philosophy Committee of the Royal Dublin Society purchased a camera for taking daguerreotypes in the same year. Photography started its journey in Ireland.

Photography was quickly taken up by Ireland’s professional and landowning classes and the residents of Ireland’s big country houses. One of Ireland’s pioneering photographers, William Despard Hemphill was a native of Clonmel

William Despard Hemphill (1816–1902) was born into a large professional middle class Church of Ireland Tipperary family in 1816. After graduating University of St Andrews, he returned to Clonmel and had a successful medical practice, being doctor…

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Sick Euphemisms

seldom am i ill
now i’m green around the gills
under the weather

trying to refrain
from blowing copious chunks
feeling dyspeptic

weak as a kitten
way down in the old dumpster
sick as a puppy.

euphemisms all
describing one ugly truth
i feel craptastic.

  
Someone needs to sing Soft Kitty to me.

Crime in Britain

If you need a good laugh this morning look no further. Notesfromtheuk.com

Ellen Hawley's avatarNotes from the U.K.

Let’s talk about crime in Britain.

On June 14, the newspaper carried two crime-related stories. The first took place on the Scilly (pronounced, yes, silly) Isles.

You have to understand that if Cornwall’s rural, the Scillies are not just rural but cut off by a whole lot of water. The only way to get there is to take a ferry or a small plane to the largest island. From there, you can take a boat to the smaller ones. None of the islands have much in the way of crime, so it made the news when someone slapped a phony parking ticket on a rented golf buggy and upset a tourist. I think a golf buggy is a golf cart in American, but I can’t swear to that because of my sports allergy, which is too severe for me to get near a golf course, never mind learn the vocabulary. Whatever…

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Margaritas

margaritas ha!
deceptively innocent
but pack a big bang!

  
frozen or on rocks
margaritas deliver
a mighty mean punch!

  
wish i could have one
but those margarita nights
played havoc with me.  

Peace, people!