If You Give a Girl a Lime

If you give a girl a lime, she’s going to need a knife to cut it into wedges.

After you give her a knife, she’ll cut her finger slicing the lime, and ask for a band-aid.

You’ll get her a band-aid, but the sight of blood will make her woozy, so she’ll ask for some gin.

And once she has some gin, she’s going to need some tonic water.

Of course, she’ll need a glass to put the gin and tonic in.

Since she has a band-aid on her finger, she’ll ask you to squeeze the lime into the glass for her.

Once the gin and tonic and lime are in the glass, obviously, she’ll feel the need to stir, so she’ll ask for a swizzle stick.

After she stirs the gin and tonic, she’s going to need an ice cube or two.

Now that her drink is mixed, she’ll ask for some privacy.

If she repeats these steps several times, the girl is going to need another lime.

Studly Doright brought home one lime a couple of days ago. What’s a girl to do?

Author: nananoyz

I'm a semi-retired crazy person with one husband and two cats.

15 thoughts on “If You Give a Girl a Lime”

  1. So funny, Leslie. Many decades ago, gin and tonic was my go-to drink. I would leave the lime slices in the glass when I made another drink. My son, young at the time and learning to count, would come to me as I relaxed on the back patio after work and say, “Mom, you have had two drinks. That’s enough!” (Don’t you hate it when a four-year-old gives you valid health advice?)

    Liked by 1 person

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