Do I Look Like a Twinkle to You?

I’ve been called by a variety of names over the course of my 61 years on earth: Leslie, Sis, Mommy, Mom, Nana, Boobsie (don’t ask), and a few less flattering ones I’m not going to mention. But a couple of days ago I was offered a new moniker.

On Thursday afternoon I had volunteered to transport a meal to a group of young single moms in Tallahassee. The coordinator paired me with someone named Robin who would prepare a meal, and my task was to meet up with Robin and then deliver the meal to the meeting in a timely fashion.

In spite of numerous texts and emails between Robin and me, we managed to get our wires crossed and ended up at two different locations. I was at one truck stop and Robin was at another just down the road. Before we resolved the issue I was standing outside the Flying J restaurant looking for someone who might be Robin. Since we’d never met I scrutinized everyone.

A car pulled up beside me and a middle-aged man rolled down his window. I thought, “Hmmm, maybe Robin is a man.” I have a male cousin named Robin, so it was a possibility.

Before I could say anything the man asked, “Say, are you Twinkle?”

Briefly taken aback, I retorted, “Hell no. Do I look like a Twinkle to you?”

He quickly rolled up his window and sped away. I got the giggles. I believe he thought I was a prostitute! Me! In my mom jeans and Star Wars t-shirt. Then it occurred to me that the “Twinkle” he was looking for was likely to be a trans prostitute. Guess I fooled him all around. Studly doesn’t call me “Boobsie” for nothing!

Author: nananoyz

I'm a semi-retired crazy person with one husband and two cats.

30 thoughts on “Do I Look Like a Twinkle to You?”

  1. Your escape reminded me of a thing I’d forgotten, young redlight Leslie. It was probably in the early 1990’s that, on a business trip in those days prior to SatNav, I found myself lost. I pulled over, parked on double-yellows in order I could read my map. When finished I looked up and noticed right in front of me a sign that read, ‘Kerb Crawlers Will Be Prosecuted – CCTV in force’ – or words to that effect. Glancing hither and yon it became clear to me (as should have been obvious when I parked up) that I was in redlight central. Gulp thrice, ‘What will Shirl say/do?’ played upon my mind all the 200 miles back home. Good fortune smiled; nothing came of my error of judgement…I guess I wouldn’t be around commenting on your blog if it had!

    Liked by 2 people

      1. haha – that is so funny to be mistaken for one….

        in 2001, I was a counselor and worked in a women’s department at a center and I often drove clients around town (in a company van) for appointments and court – etc.
        and one lady – well one night she “schooled” me on how to spot the working woman.
        “Nah, that one is a student – see the backpack?”
        “Nope – she is just a shopper – …”

        “There – see her – just a water bottle and then a small bag – she’s waiting…”
        it was something I will always remember

        Liked by 2 people

      1. Actually you were brilliant. Seriously. I loved your riposte. But the whole scenario is hysterical, the idea of you waiting for Robin and yes, Robin could have been a fellah and here’s this guy looking for ‘Twinkle.’ xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Twinkle…well, you are a shinning star. The brightest that be in bohemia. And “Twinkle” is appreciably lighter than some true Floridian flavored nom de naughty like, “Hanging Chad.”

    A.T. Home
    Demimonde, Delaware

    Liked by 1 person

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