Do I Look Like a Twinkle to You?

I’ve been called by a variety of names over the course of my 61 years on earth: Leslie, Sis, Mommy, Mom, Nana, Boobsie (don’t ask), and a few less flattering ones I’m not going to mention. But a couple of days ago I was offered a new moniker.

On Thursday afternoon I had volunteered to transport a meal to a group of young single moms in Tallahassee. The coordinator paired me with someone named Robin who would prepare a meal, and my task was to meet up with Robin and then deliver the meal to the meeting in a timely fashion.

In spite of numerous texts and emails between Robin and me, we managed to get our wires crossed and ended up at two different locations. I was at one truck stop and Robin was at another just down the road. Before we resolved the issue I was standing outside the Flying J restaurant looking for someone who might be Robin. Since we’d never met I scrutinized everyone.

A car pulled up beside me and a middle-aged man rolled down his window. I thought, “Hmmm, maybe Robin is a man.” I have a male cousin named Robin, so it was a possibility.

Before I could say anything the man asked, “Say, are you Twinkle?”

Briefly taken aback, I retorted, “Hell no. Do I look like a Twinkle to you?”

He quickly rolled up his window and sped away. I got the giggles. I believe he thought I was a prostitute! Me! In my mom jeans and Star Wars t-shirt. Then it occurred to me that the “Twinkle” he was looking for was likely to be a trans prostitute. Guess I fooled him all around. Studly doesn’t call me “Boobsie” for nothing!

Author: nananoyz

I'm a semi-retired crazy person with one husband and two cats.

30 thoughts on “Do I Look Like a Twinkle to You?”

  1. Your escape reminded me of a thing I’d forgotten, young redlight Leslie. It was probably in the early 1990’s that, on a business trip in those days prior to SatNav, I found myself lost. I pulled over, parked on double-yellows in order I could read my map. When finished I looked up and noticed right in front of me a sign that read, ‘Kerb Crawlers Will Be Prosecuted – CCTV in force’ – or words to that effect. Glancing hither and yon it became clear to me (as should have been obvious when I parked up) that I was in redlight central. Gulp thrice, ‘What will Shirl say/do?’ played upon my mind all the 200 miles back home. Good fortune smiled; nothing came of my error of judgement…I guess I wouldn’t be around commenting on your blog if it had!

    Liked by 2 people

      1. haha – that is so funny to be mistaken for one….

        in 2001, I was a counselor and worked in a women’s department at a center and I often drove clients around town (in a company van) for appointments and court – etc.
        and one lady – well one night she “schooled” me on how to spot the working woman.
        “Nah, that one is a student – see the backpack?”
        and
        “Nope – she is just a shopper – …”

        then
        “There – see her – just a water bottle and then a small bag – she’s waiting…”
        it was something I will always remember

        Liked by 2 people

      1. Actually you were brilliant. Seriously. I loved your riposte. But the whole scenario is hysterical, the idea of you waiting for Robin and yes, Robin could have been a fellah and here’s this guy looking for ‘Twinkle.’ xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Twinkle…well, you are a shinning star. The brightest that be in bohemia. And “Twinkle” is appreciably lighter than some true Floridian flavored nom de naughty like, “Hanging Chad.”

    regards,
    A.T. Home
    Demimonde, Delaware

    Liked by 1 person

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