Tag: weight loss

No Passport Required

Thanks to my Fitbit I’m just four pounds shy of my pre-Ireland trip weight loss goal. I’m not sure if the Irish will fully appreciate the lengths to which I’ve gone for my visit to their fair shores, but Fitbit seems proud of my efforts.

Just a couple of days ago the fine folks at Fitbit awarded me this prestigious badge. I’ve walked 1,600 miles since slapping the precocious pedometer on my wrist, a total equal to the length of Australia’s The Great Barrier Reef. Perhaps Studly and I should visit down under instead of Ireland.

Peace, people.

2017 in 2017

I’ve gained quite a bit of weight in the past two years. I’d be more specific, but who needs the depressing details? Let’s just say that the bathroom scales and I have climbed to previously untapped heights and leave it at that.


Early on New Year’s Day I was scrolling through Facebook and saw a post about a challenge to walk/run 2017 miles in 2017. The sign up deadline was midnight on 1/1/17, so I hesitated for only a moment before clicking on the link and paying my money. 

I’m now committed (or perhaps should be). 2017 miles in 365 days means I need to average 5.5 miles a day this year, or 38.5 per week. I jokingly told a blogging friend that as of Friday I only have 2016.5 miles to go. The truth is, I’m kind of on track. With one and a half days left in this first week of January I’ve walked almost 32 miles! 


Hopefully I’ll have more weight loss success than this guy ^^^.

Remember the scene in the original Peter Pan where Tinker Bell is on the verge of fading into oblivion and Peter, a.k.a. Mary Martin, begs the audience to applaud to bring her back? I used to clap so loudly that the folks next door complained to my parents. Well, I’m going to need your applause here if I’m going to succeed in walking 2017 miles this year. Exercise is not my first (or third or ninetieth) inclination, but with your help, as Peter Pan is my witness, I can do this.

https://youtu.be/A6IKaLF4Fqc

Peace, people! Um, I can’t hear you. 

Round is a Shape

I am woefully out of shape. Most likely this is a direct result of a severe aversion to exercise and a fondness for Krispy Kreme donuts.

Rather than do anything to remedy my lack of physical fitness, I just turned to Pinterest to sum up my feelings. Sharing one’s feelings is healthy, right?

  
  
   
    
 

i want to look like jennifer aniston:
firm legs, tight butt, an angel’s smile.

  
instead i’m closer to chris christie
in looks and girth and style.

  
peace, people!

Revulsion Therapy Diet

Revulsion therapy revealed to be
The secret to losing weight
No exercise or counting calories
Just eat while watching GOP debates.

It’s hard to keep one’s appetite
Or to hold one’s food in check
While Cruz prays like a Pharisee
And Trump spews racist rhetoric.

Bush’s bemused befuddlement
Plays havoc with digestion
Still Carson’s sonorous delivery
Works exactly like L-Tryptophan.

One caveat for those who choose
To suffer through this hell
Not only will pounds melt away
Your sanity might, as well.

Fitbit Follies

Today I

–went to the Tallahassee Mall and made myself dizzy repeatedly walking a tight loop so I could get in 10 flights of stairs before my movie started.

–walked an extra circuit around Lake Ella in downtown Tallahassee so I could have a beer before bedtime.

–left my iPhone in the bedroom knowing that I’d have to make an extra trip back there to retrieve it, thus topping the 10,000 step mark.

–calculated the number of tortilla chips I could eat with my beer without going into the red zone on my Fitbit. (2)

–realized that I’ve lost 6 pounds. 😍

I kind of love my Fitbit.

  
Peace, people!