Tripping

Studly Doright and I are getting away for a few days. We’re heading to a resort hotel on Clearwater Beach for a belated 40th anniversary celebration. Hopefully the weather will cooperate and we’ll have fun in the sun instead of a fizzle in the drizzle.

My pre-vacation ritual always includes a couple of days in which we aren’t allowed to wear anything that might need to be packed. If at all possible one should just sit around the house naked, but Studly Doright played golf yesterday, and he’ll need to report to work this morning, both of which are better done clothed.

As for me, well…

  
Yes, I might or might not be naked right now, not for any prurient reason, but solely to avoid doing unnecessary loads of laundry. 

  
Ok, so I’m not naked, but I am wearing a pair of too tight, too short yoga pants and a faded pink t-shirt that I pulled from the deepest, darkest corner of my closet. 

  
At some point today I’ll make a trip to the grocery store. I’ll probably change into something less offensive. Or not.

 

Peace, people!

Walmart Proposal or Finally Hitting the Big Time

Studly Doright and I have been married for more than 39 years now. I know what you’re thinking, “Man, that Studly is one lucky son of a gun.” And you’d be right. Apparently, I’m a heckuva catch. 

Just this afternoon at Walmart a young man on the pet food aisle chatted me up about my cats and made additional small talk before asking, “So, are you married?” 

I blinked rapidly several times and then in a too loud voice responded, “Yep! Yep! Old and married.”

“Too bad,” he responded and sauntered away. 

He wasn’t my type. The saggy, baggy jeans were a deal breaker. Well, that and the “I look like I just got out of jail” vibe he was putting out. Still, if Studly ever forgets just how lucky he is, I have at least one prospect.

Note: My Walmart beau looked a lot better than any of these guys:

 

Is this the legendary Camo Fairy?
  
Barney called. He wants his suit back.
  
Don’t you wish your boyfriend was hot like me?
  
Gary had a little lamb.
 Peace, people!