Hostess with the Leastest

I used to fantasize endlessly about being the perfect hostess for a holiday soirée. As a young bride I immersed myself in the Christmas catalogs from major retailers like JC Penney, Sears, and Spiegel, picturing myself in the ideal hostess gown, serving cute petit fours from a silver tray, while guests milled about my tastefully decorated home with crystal tumblers filled with tasteful cocktails in their hands.

Indeed, I hadn’t a clue about hosting any kind of elegant gathering. My knowledge of the social graces was limited to what I’d watched on the silver screen: Extended pinkie, napkin on lap. Besides, Studly Doright and I had barely two cents to rub together, and the resources we did have would certainly not have been spent on something as frivolous as a party. But I did a lot of dreaming.

The Hickory Farms catalog was an important part of the fantasy, as well. I received one in the mail today, and that triggered this post.

As a terrible cook, I reasoned that all I’d need to do to insure a picture perfect party was to order the right combination of sausages, cheeses, and spreads from Hickory Farms in order to impress my guests.

Everything they offer looks so festive.

Now that I’m much older and can afford to throw a really elegant event I find I don’t want to; although, part of me still wants to order from Hickory Farms and wear a vintage hostess dress. May I interest you in some hors d’oeuvres?

Am I the only one who did this kind of thing? Please tell me I’m not alone.

Peace, people.

Snapshot #186

I haven’t posted a snapshot for several days, mostly because I’ve been a lazy slug, but today I was shopping for a robe to pack for Ireland and wandered into J.C. Penney in Tallahassee. Finding nothing in the lingerie department to suit me, I checked the swimsuit section because sometimes swimsuit cover-ups are the perfect light robes for travel. 

Imagine my confusion when this sight greeted me in swimwear. I’m calling this one, “Not Your Daughter’s Bikini.”

In a Letter

http://youtu.be/Tb7tWYYkF74

If this song doesn’t make you want to dance there is something seriously wrong with you, and you should make an appointment with your physician as soon as humanly possible. Of course, that’s just my humble opinion.

Music by Clairy Browne and The Bangin’ Rackettes.

Peace, People.