Seriously, there are few things as satisfying to me as successfully fitting my iPhone’s ear buds into their storage compartment on the first try.
Peace, people!
Tag: humor
Hormonally Challenged
Some nights it doesn’t pay
to try and fall asleep.
I toss, turn, fume, and burn
and sometimes even weep.
My brain is heavy in its cage
too tired to engage in thought,
still round and round it plods
until every nerve is shot.
Physically I’m just a mess
of hot and sweaty limbs;
sticky breasts, and chafing thighs
turn nighttime hours grim.
Just once I’d like to fall asleep
free of worry, care, and pain,
yet I fear that won’t take place
until I’ve died or gone insane.
Peace, people!
Math Humor for the Good of Humanity
Well, that might be overstating my point, but
I taught math to sixth graders. Trust me when I say it helps to foster a sense of humor.
And sometimes a joke will spark an understanding, an aha! moment,
not to mention a shared experience. Never underestimate the power of shared laughter as a teaching tool,
because some students latch on to the offbeat as a way to store information that otherwise would pass right over their heads.
Cooking for Studly: Not an Update
A friend shared this on Facebook and tagged me in the post.
So far, no demons have been summoned in my cooking adventures, but just in case, I won’t be cooking anything from scratch.
Peace, people!
Spending Time with a Three Year Old
After spending one day with a twelve year old grandson and another day with a ten year old granddaughter how hard could it be to hang out for an hour with a three year old? At Walmart? In the toy section?
It was an hour of bargaining and logic.
Me: Harper, I need to go to Walmart to buy cat litter and milk.
Harper: And toys Nana?
Me: Nope; just milk and cat litter (at this point both the older siblings elected to stay home).
Harper: OK, Nana.
In the car:
Harper: Nana, play Uptown Funk.
Me: I don’t have Uptown Funk.
Harper: Yes, you do.
Me: No I don’t, but let’s see if we can find a radio station that’s playing Uptown Funk.
(Believe it or not it was playing on one of the first stations I tuned into on Sirius.)
Harper: See, Nana! I told you that you have Uptown Funk.
Me: Yes, you did. (Sigh)
At Walmart:
Harper: Can I get a toy Nana?
Me: You really don’t need a toy sweetie.
Harper: Can I just look at toys.
Me: Let’s put you in the shopping cart and go find the cat litter.
Harper: If I ride in the cart can I have a toy?
Me: (At this point I know I’m buying the kid a toy, but I’m not ready to concede just yet) Let’s find the things we need and we’ll talk about it.
Harper: (At this point the kid knows she’s getting a toy, but she plays it cool.) Ok, Nana!
We found the cat litter and were on our way to the dairy section when it occurred to me that it might take Harper more than a few minutes to pick out a toy and that it would be better to take care of that before going to buy milk.
When we got to the toy department I helped Harper out of the cart and she headed immediately to toys from the movie, Frozen, and found a package containing a Barbie-sized Elsa and Ana as well as Olaf, the snowman and Sven, the reindeer. Her eyes lit up.
Harper: Can I have this Nana? I won’t ever need any more toys!
Now, how could I resist that? Without complaining she let me put her back in the cart and we picked up milk and a few more goodies. The whole time Harper kept up a running commentary about her new toys.
Harper: Nana, do you think Sven can talk? I think Sven can talk because he’s a reindeer. Nana, what’s a reindeer? Is Olaf a real snowman? Do you like Elsa or Ana best? Will you play with my toys when we get home? Do you have scissors in your car because we need scissors to open this package. I think Sven can talk. Is he a real reindeer?
Me: Maybe I need some Advil.
Harper: Nana, do you need a band-aid?
Me: Maybe. Will a band-aid make my head stop hurting?
Harper: Yes, Nana.
In the car:
Harper: Play Uptown Funk.
At the Quad Cities Family Entertainment Center later that day:
Apparently band-aids help with headaches.
When You Gotta Go…
I let my 12 year old grandson help write my blog post for today. He picked out this meme:
I picked out this one:
Both are fitting for the start of my long journey home, because this
Is so very true.
It’s been such a fun week with the grandkids. We went bowling, played laser tag, and video games, feasted on junk foods, and acted out scenes from Frozen until I had ice shards shooting out of my nose.
My plan is to reach the southeast side of Nashville on Monday afternoon and maybe relax in the pool for a few minutes. A bit of relaxation might be in order after all the fun. I’ll miss these guys, but Studly Doright is ready to see me.
Cooking for Studly: July Update
As July 2015 fades into history I must confess that I have faded as a cook this month, as well. I’ve relied heavily on frozen entrees these past 31 days, blaming my lapses in the kitchen on a number of worthy excuses:
- Time spent working in Studly Doright’s shop
- Oppressive heat
- Menopause
- Humidity
- Blogging
- Travel
- Cat videos
- Politics
- Sinus issues
I’m running out of excuses, and once I return home from visiting my daughter in Illinois I’ll need to either start cooking again or come up with some better evasive tactics. I’m open to suggestions.
Peace, people!
Relationships
Just so you know– 
Or as I like to call it, my biological ladder.
Peace, people!
One for the Road
This morning I set out from Doright Manor near Tallahassee, Florida, on a trip to see my daughter and her family in Illinois. I’ll tally over a thousand miles on the trip to Illinois, necessitating an overnight stop.
Right now I’m relaxing in my hotel room in Paducah, Kentucky. Paducah is a pleasant community, home of the National Quilt Museum and a terrific arts and antiques district. On this trip, though, I’m only seeing the inside of my room.
Friends and family wondered why I decided to drive rather than fly, and to be honest a couple of hundred miles back I was wondering the same thing. Driving all day in sometimes brutal interstate highway traffic has every muscle in my body wound tightly and in desperate need of a massage.
In spite of that I enjoy driving when I have the time. It gives me a sense of control that flying doesn’t. I have my own car at my disposal instead of needing to rent or commandeer one at my destination.
Early on this morning I promised myself I would resist the impulse to load up on junk foods and diet sodas during my journey. In fact, I decided I’d stick to healthy foods only.
That promise lasted for approximately an hour into my drive when I stopped to use the ladies room at a Burger King and exited the establishment with a large diet Dr. Pepper and a cinnamon roll.
It all went downhill from there, but I do think there might’ve been a carrot or two in my Mexican food dinner. The lime in the Corona Light I had an hour ago was most likely the healthiest part of my day. Note to self: must do better tomorrow.
Paducah is more than half way to my daughter’s home, and there aren’t any major metropolitan areas between here and there. If I get up early I can be there by early afternoon. And tomorrow, I’m eating healthy! Although, I think there’s a Krispy Kreme on my route….
Peace, people!
Perspective
A young woman says, this is my body; this is who i am.
A middle aged woman says, this is my body; it’s a part of who i am.
An old woman says, who the hell am i, and where did this saggy old body come from?
I’m somewhere between middle aged and old. My thighs have become best friends, and even though they sometimes rub each other the wrong way I’m glad they still offer support.
peace, people!
Praying for Eyebrowz 