Tag: humor

Dolly, Jolene, and Pentatonix: At Long Last, Love

I absolutely hated the song Jolene when it was released in 1974. I mimicked Dolly’s voice, bleating out, rather than belting out, the lyrics about a woman in danger of losing her man to the much lovelier Jolene. And what kind of crazy, made up name was Jolene anyway? (My apologies to all the actual women I now know who bear that moniker.)

But the tune slowly grew on me over the decades. While I didn’t actually like the song, I didn’t despise it anymore either. If the strains of Jolene began playing on a country oldies station I didn’t automatically switch to an alternate channel. 

And now there’s this lovely acapella version of the song featuring Dolly Parton and Pentatonix. Pardon me while I sing along.

http://youtu.be/oYCoyUxY2HY

Peace, people!

My Way 

I just thought this was funny. 


And I’m willing to bet, if you’re of a certain age, you probably sang this line in your best imitation of Frank Sinatra. 

If you aren’t of a certain age, here’s the reference. Croon along:

http://youtu.be/J9Enr0FW6E8
Peace, people!

Snapshot #27

This one is called, “In My Pajamas Before 7 p.m. on a Saturday Night” or “Too Sad for Words.”

Pest Control


One night last week I killed a Buick sized roach in my bedroom closet. Now the pest control company, Orkin, and I have this understanding– I pay them a substantial amount of money, and they make sure I don’t see any creepy crawlies inside my home. I assure you, I’m  keeping my end of the bargain.

This post isn’t about my one roach. Roaches aren’t really newsworthy in the Florida panhandle, but I have a friend who recently moved to Oregon and her pest issue is enormous: 

http://www.dailyastorian.com/Local_News/20160719/animal-versus-animal-as-elk-dogs-clash
Elk are taking over her yard, creating divots that she patiently replaces, and generally terrorizing the neighborhood. And they can be aggressive. I worry for her safety. Say what you will about roaches, but I’ve never heard of anyone being trampled to death by one.

In our text chat on Wednesday morning I suggested various remedies:


Granted, the spikes might be ill-advised, and we are animal lovers, after all. My friend did say they’d tried spraying wolf urine around the edges of their lawn with no success. Can you imagine going into the local feed and seed store and ordering thirty gallons of wolf pee? And having that pee fail to do its job?

I don’t guess Orkin handles elk. On the plus side, one isn’t likely to find an elk skittering across the bathroom floor at 2 a.m.


I hope my friend and her husband find an elk solution soon, but I fear nature will have its way in this case. 

Peace, people!

Workin’ It

After many months of being a domestic goddess I’m off to work again. Part of me is saying, “Woohoo” while the other part is asking, “What was I thinking?”

The toughest obstacle thus far this morning was dragging my feeble body out of bed when the 6 a.m. alarm sounded. I’d been wide awake since 4:30 either from anticipation or dread; I’m not certain.

Obstacle number two was getting dressed in something other than denim capris, a tshirt, and flip flops. I almost cried when I placed my feet in regular shoes. I’m so sorry, feet!

And instead of my normal brunch I had to eat breakfast! To ease the strain of eating something before 9 a.m. I stopped at Cinnabon and scarfed down a serving of Cinna minis with icing. My feet might hate me, but my tummy is so pleased.

Now, having arrived a full thirty minutes early for my assignment, I’m sitting in the car in front of a school in Tallahassee listening to Howard Stern and scanning the cars in the parking lot for my coworkers, none of whom I’ve met. Surely they’ll be easy to spot. We all have identical green suitcases packed with testing materials.

Wish me luck, friends. If you don’t hear from me again you’ll know I truly was allergic to work and couldn’t afford an epi pen.

Peace, people.

Snapshot #26

This one’s called “Waiting for the Service Tech Who Was Suppsed To Have Been Here Between Ten and Twelve and Still Hasn’t Arrived.”