Hairy Situation

On Tuesday I had a haircut and color scheduled in Blountstown, but first I had to drive into Tallahassee for a few groceries. I knew that the Publix on Tennessee would have everything I needed, and it’s on my side of town, so I pulled in there. After gathering everything on my list, including some amazing tomatoes, I went to the checkout.

The young lady stationed at the register complimented me on my hair. I thanked her then told her I was scheduled for a trim that afternoon. All perfectly innocent, right? Wrong. The slightly older-than-me woman who came up behind me in the line began a rant aimed at me and women like me.

She began with a rueful laugh, “You modern women,” she sneered. “You think you can ignore God’s law.”

I’m sure my eyes grew large, but I continued with my transaction and smiled at her, hoping to calm her down.

She quoted 1 Corinthians 11:15 in a scary voice, saying, “But if a woman has long hair, it is her glory? For her hair is given to her for a covering.”

“You have shamed yourself,” she cried. “God’s word is not negotiable.”

Now, I looked this woman in the eye and calmly said, “Ma’am, I’m a breast cancer survivor.”

You should’ve seen her face. She backed down without saying another word. Of course I didn’t tell her that my diagnosis was 11 years ago, and that since I never had to undergo chemotherapy I never lost my hair, but the self-righteous old biddy deserved a bit of a comeuppance. No regrets.

Peace, people