If you’re anything like me this is an outline of the things you stand to lose beginning in your 40’s:
The first to go will be your 20/20 vision, and even if you already wear corrective lenses suddenly you’ll be unable to read the fine print on medicine bottles. And it happens overnight, literally “now you see it; now you don’t.”
Next on the chopping block is your ability to hear words in normal conversation or on the movie screen. “What’d they say?” will become your new theme song. I chalk this loss up to too many years of loud rock and roll. “Huh?”
Sometime after the hearing begins to go, you might notice your bladder starts to lose its ability to hold out against sneezing, coughing, and laughing. Invest now in bladder control products.
The memory might’ve started to wane around the same time as the hearing, but I really can’t remember.
As long as I don’t lose my sense of humor I guess I’ll muddle through: blind as a bat, hard of hearing, incontinent, and forgetful. Baby, I’ve got it all going on.
Peace, people.
Praying for Eyebrowz 
Ain’t that the truth… 😉
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Unfortunately!
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Peace Leslie xxxxx
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I need it!
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Hee hee . I think we all do at certain stages xxxxxxxx
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Too funny! Unfortunately, I do relate!
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What did I leave out?
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Well, there are the things we gain: stiff joints first thing in the morning, immovable bulge around the middle, nose hair, grey hair, and senior discounts come to mind (until I forget). 🙂
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Yes, I’m particularly proud of those extra 10 pounds that don’t respond to any amount of diet and/or exercise.
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I hear you, Leslie!
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oo-er
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You are spot on with everything and in the correct order too! How about chin hairs?!!
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Oh, excellent. If I had a dollar for every chin hair I’ve plucked I could buy a good hearing aid.
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Yes to all of the above. I started watching all TV shows and movies with the captions turned on. I was losing too many words and blaming it on characters’ mumbling!
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Oh! And here I thought they WERE mumbling. Damn.
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We’re using the closed-captioning on TV more and more. It’s not just because we can’t hear as well (my wife uses hearing aids). So many of the shows now have rapid-paced dialogue, and I can’t keep up! – Marty
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The fast pace doesn’t bother me as much as the (perceived) mumbling. There have been entire scenes in Game of Thrones where I’ve not understood a word.
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