Patriotism is a fine thing, but yesterday afternoon I was walking down the sidewalk in Blountstown, Florida, when out of the red, white, and blue, I was accosted by our Stars and Stripes. A strong gust of wind caught the darned thing just as I passed by, and whack! Old Glory slapped the top of my head, almost knocking me into a pickup parked by the curb.
Okay, so I wasn’t exactly paying attention to my surroundings, but still, shouldn’t a citizen be safe from killer flags? Betsy Ross surely didn’t intend to let loose this flapping monster on unsuspecting citizens.