Why I Am Thankful for Donald Trump

“The worst enemy you can meet will always be yourself.” ~ Nietzsche

In an effort to prove Friedrich wrong, I have decided to exact my own metamorphosis by befriending myself, and in so doing transform myself from cynical stink bug to thankful praying mantis. In order to achieve this goal, I will list only ten of the uge number of reasons

I am thankful…for Donald Trump:

1. His indiscriminate, erratic and often illegal behavior, his lack of experience, his absence of ability, and his deficient mental capacity have inspired me to enter into the next presidential election myself.
2. In the past I blamed only myself for my failings, but now I realize I am responsible for nothing.
3. I have never declared bankruptcy, so even if I were to file five times, I’d still be one down on Mr Trump.
4. There are not 3,500 lawsuits filed against me– ranging from sexual misconduct…