(Caution–some strong language)
Picture if you will Mr. and Mrs. Republican. We’ll call her Jane and him Dick. The two have gathered with their 2.5 children (Dick Jr., Little Mary and a player to be named later) ’round the dinner table.
Dick: Look at this fine dinner your mother has prepared! Little Dick, why don’t you ask the blessing?
Dick Jr.: Ok, Daddy. Dear God, thank you for this meal, and please don’t let that bitch Hillary Clinton become the president. Amen.
Jane: Little Dick! That was hardly a Christian prayer!
Dick: Son, you can’t just say that word in a prayer. Er, (looking at Jane) or about a woman.
Dick Jr.: But Daddy, I heard you call her a bitch.
Dick: Yes, but I’m a grown up. Pass the roast.
Little Mary: Mommy, what’s a bitch?
Jane: (sternly looking at big Dick) Sweetheart, that’s what a female dog is called.
Little Mary: Bitch! Bitch! Bitch!
Jane: Sweetheart, let’s not say that.
Dick: I’m sick of political correctness! Call a spic a spic, a coon a coon and a bitch a bitch. You know that dear. That’s why we’re voting for Donald Trump.
Jane: (covering Little Mary’s ears) Well, about that. Well, hmmm, I’m not sure I can support Trump.
Dick: (slams hand on table) For heaven’s sake Jane! We’ve always voted Republican, and we’ll continue to vote Republican. Now, pass the potatoes. Did I tell you Rev. Johnson stopped by work today?
Jane: Oh? What was he doing?
Dick: Well, he’s in charge of the county’s “Baptists for Trump” rally and he asked if I’d introduce him.
Jane: I don’t know why our church endorsed Trump. Shouldn’t the church stay out of politics?
Dick: Not with that Hillary knocking on the door of the White House.
Dick Jr.: Trump that bitch!!
Dick: (ruffling son’s hair) Now, Little Dick….
Jane: Little Dick, if you say that word one more time you’ll go to your room without dinner.
Dick: (winks at son) Best mind your mom, son.
Jane: (frowning) Maybe I just won’t vote this year.
Dick: (turning red in the face) Now Jane, remember the good book says you must submit to your husband. Your husband says you’ll vote for Trump and that’s the end of this conversation.
Little Mary: But Mommy!
Jane: What sweetheart?
Little Mary: Didn’t preacher say we need to be like Jesus?
Jane: Yes. Yes he did.
Little Mary: Did Jesus say it was ok to grab women by their pussies?
Jane: Oh! Little Mary! We just don’t say things like that, and Jesus would never have done such a thing.
Little Mary: Then why does Daddy like Mr. Trump?
Jane: I’m beginning to wonder.
Note: I started this piece months ago, but just felt it was too dark and too cynical to publish. Then Trump went there, boasting of having groped women against their will, bragging that they let him because he was a celebrity. Still, I thought, surely this will give those evangelical Christians who’d thus far supported him time to reflect and realize that Trump really is the antithesis of Christian love, respect, and humility.
Then last night I came across a video post on Facebook that shook me. A supposedly good Christian man was exhorting people to put their trust in Trump. Most alarming, though were the comments of people I know, groupie-like in their pleas for Donald Trump to avoid some trap the media had set for him–the trap of telling the truth.
Jesus loves Trump, but I’m pretty sure he would drive him from the temple with whips and chains given the chance. God help us all if Trump wins this election. Can I get an amen?