Unhappy Nap

Have you ever awakened from a nap only to think, “Just shoot me now?” After lunch, I couldn’t keep my eyes open, so I plopped down on the couch and went to sleep for a little less than an hour. Now I feel as though I’ve been tackled by a 6’5”, 320 pound linebacker and left to nurse my bruises on an unforgiving astroturf field. Ugh.

To make things worse, I startled the cat when I raised my head from the pillow, and she left an inch-long scratch on my left shin in her mad dash to escape. Now, it’s throbbing to some weird staccato beat: Thrump, thrump, thrumpety-thrump, thrump, and my head has joined in on the refrain.

The cat has recovered nicely and is out on the screened-in porch enjoying the sunshine and warmth. Meanwhile I’m trying to cure a headache with a cup of hot tea while my leg continues throbbing. Things will get better soon. Right?

Headache

She’s a fearsome broad–
This headache.
Trapped within the narrow
Confines of my skull.
Pounding her knobby fists
Whump! Whump! Whump!
Against my brow
Inside out.
Kicking her gaudy stilettos
Whomp! Whomp! Whomp!
Into my cheekbones
Upside down.
I’ve made an offering
Of peace.
A sacrifice of two orange
Gel-filled caplets slugged back
Shot style.
Hurry, relief.

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