Every day brings a new look into this man’s character, or lack thereof. Today Trump ejected a crying baby from a venue. A baby, for heaven’s sake! Aren’t politicians supposed to love babies?
In the spirit of a David Letterman Top Ten routine, let’s break down the top ten actual reasons Trump might have had a baby shown to the exit:
10. The baby’s hands were larger than Trump’s.
9. Putin called and demanded the baby be ejected immediately.
8. Trump was afraid the baby was demanding the release of his tax returns.
7. Baby’s cries of “Waaa! Waaa!” easily mistaken for “Wall! Wall!” and Trump still has no idea how to get one built.
6. Trump had a huuuuge headache and the baby was getting on his last nerve.
5. The baby’s basic understanding of the U.S. Constitution greatly exceeded Trump’s.
4. Because women are having babies and some of them grow up to be murderers, some grow up to be rapists, and some, he assumes grow up to be good people. The odds weren’t in this baby’s favor.
3. The baby appeared to be rigged in favor of the Democrats.
2. Firing the baby wasn’t an option.
And the number one reason Trump had this baby booted from the event:
Baby might have ties to the Muslim Brotherhood.
Praying for Eyebrowz 
I’d guess it’s either number 4 or number 5.
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I couldn’t sleep last night because my brain kept generating better reasons. I really should open this post up for other suggestions. My favorite that didn’t make the list is, George Bush and Ted Cruz formally endorsed the baby.
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That sounds a pretty convincing reason too. I still think number five is the most likely, though. If it’s not that, then perhaps he was simply outraged by the baby’s superior knowledge of geopolitics.
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Oh! I like that one.
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