SVETLANA’S SPELL

Friends and family thought me insane

for falling under Svetlana’s spell

yet I fell hook, line and sinker

you see she was a loving kind of girl

She first sought me out at the banquet

I hosted for the Queen

played footsie under the table

had the finest cleavage I’d ever seen

Begged me to drive her home that night

in my Bentley where of clothes she shed

my chauffeur discreet in his driver’s seat

Svet unadorned as if a newly wed

And later back at her place

some hovel near Earl’s Court

she forced me to make love to her

she was a dominating sort

It seemed Svet couldn’t get enough of me

we did ‘rude’ things far and wide

at Royal Ascot, Henley, Wimbledon

in public places countywide

The PM took me aside one day

said, ‘You’re punching above your weight

for that gal is a money grabbing…