Studly suffers from the cruel, non-fatal, yet highly contagious condition known as “misaphonia,” more commonly called “hatred of sound.” Specifically, he cannot tolerate any type of noise associated with eating, i.e. crunching, slurping, smacking, etc. His condition is so severe that he can’t bear to watch those Kit Kat commercials where people crunch to the tune of, “Give me a break, give me a break. Break me off a piece of that Kit Kat bar.”
No biggie, right? Wrong. No one can eat any type of crunchy fare (I.e. chips, popcorn, apples, hard candy, mixed nuts, etc.) in his presence without triggering his annoyance. I swear he once chastised me for eating a marshmallow too loudly.
The worst part? Studly has turned both of our children into misophones as well. Thank goodness they are both grown with homes of their own. Family dinners were once a nightmare. I’d take a bite and look up to find three pairs of eyes giving me different gradations of the “look” indicating that I was violating their code of crunchiness.
Nowadays I revel in eating by myself whenever the situation arises. I crunch and munch and smack my lips in delight. I even chew my ice with abandon. When I have the grandkids I assure them that dining can be fun, that a little smacking and crunching is allowed. Their response:
“Nana, can you please chew more quietly?” Well, maybe for them I can try.
Peace, People!
Praying for Eyebrowz 
Studly and I have something in common. You are such a hoot. Keep on crunchin’, lady…just now when I’m in the room.
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It is contagious, though. I get annoyed because I know he gets annoyed.
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I’m with studly. My dad passed the hatred on to me. I even have it so badly that if i see a stranger smacking, or chewing with their mouths open i’m completely grossed out. It’s revulsion plain and simple. I cannot stand it.
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I’m almost that bad, but Studly is much worse than me.
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