Month: December 2015

Skewed Priorities

I’ve mentioned before that I have a tendency toward hypochondria. Any splotch becomes a melanoma, every cough a case of pneumonia, a brief lapse in memory is perceived as senility. My mind is my worst enemy. 

So this afternoon when I had two weird twinges in my chest I immediately turned to Studly Doright and announced that I was having a heart attack. I’ve already survived one fake heart attack, so I know all the symptoms. 

Neither one of us got too upset, until I realized that if I had a heart attack for real it might put me in danger of missing opening weekend for Star Wars The Force Awakens! I refuse to even consider that occurrence, so any heart attacks, real or imagined, have to wait until after the Star Wars franchise has run its course. I might live forever. 

May the Force be with you. And me. 

Peace, people.

  

Dream Big

I woke myself up singing, Ain’t No Sunshine at five this morning.  I’d been dreaming about planning a farewell party for a co-worker who was moving on to bigger and better things. A few of my office mates had made signs and party favors. Others had baked cookies and cakes. I was in charge of entertainment. As the time for the festivities approached I still had no idea what form that entertainment was going to take.

But then, like a scene from an old Elvis Presley movie where folks would urge this good looking random stranger in the crowd to get up and sing, and he’d do his “aw shucks no” routine all the while rising with guitar in hand to take the stage and make girls swoon, I stood in my dream and belted out Ain’t No Sunshine. 

I even changed up the lyrics a bit to fit the occasion. Instead of the repetition of, “I know, I know, I know…” I sang, “She glows, she glows, she glows….” And in lieu of the vaguely inappropriate line that follows: “I oughta leave the young thing alone, but ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone,” I sang, “She’s a star wherever she goes, but ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone.”

All this in my sleep. Other stuff went on in this epic dream. Most notably I made out with a stranger, who I strongly suspect was Studly Doright in disguise because he kissed exactly like Studly. He’s my sunshine.

For your listening pleasure, the great Bill Withers (following a brief, yet annoying advertisement.)

http://youtu.be/tIdIqbv7SPo

Slay Bells: Sort of a Review of Krampus

I saw Krampus last weekend. (Cue evil laugh.)

  
What a fun, frightening, good old-fashioned horror film! 

The cast, led by Toni Collette and Adam Scott, is perfect in this holiday from hell. Their family’s upscale Christmas celebration is first darkened by the arrival of the perpetually down on their luck relatives who are more than just a little reminiscent of Randy Quaid and Miriam Flynn’s characters in Christmas Vacation. But obnoxious relatives become the least of this family’s worries.

Remember in Christmas Vacation the chaos that ensued when in lieu of a hefty Christmas bonus Clark Griswold received a crappy fruitcake from his clueless boss? The family in Krampus would have welcomed the fruitcake. Instead, they receive a visit from Santa’s “shadow” after their young son’s Christmas wish goes horribly wrong. Or perhaps horribly right. Perspective is everything.

I haven’t enjoyed a horror film this much in years. The slasher films leave me cold–all blood and guts with no real story. Krampus has some of the blood and a few of the guts, a heap of great suspenseful moments, what with a blackout blizzard and evil creatures hiding in dark, swirly places, and a bit of a story. Maybe there’s a moral tucked in there, as well. “Be careful child, for what you wish.”

  
Peace, people!

Secrets

Photo by Ginna Greig Hall

Softly lies the mist
soothing mirrored surfaces
silent secrets kept

Etch-a-Sketch

geometrics
squares within squares
within squares
and on into
infinity

stare tunnel-ward
feel the draw of hyperspace
or shrink into
nothingness, as near
as possible

at the epicenter
just a dot stands guard;
a placeholder
hinting at the end of
this world

or a precipice
into a universe beyond
tunnel’s end
oh, such exquisite
possibilities.

  
I’m no artist, and that’s probably why my time fiddling with an Etch-a-Sketch consisted primarily of drawing decreasing squares until I could go no further. The resulting tunnel provided countless hours of contemplation for me as a child. I’m either incredibly imaginative or unbelievably dull.

Peace, people!

A letter to Mark and Priscilla they will never read

Great thoughts! Inesemjphotography.com.

inese's avatarMaking memories

Dear Mark and Priscilla!

Many happy wishes and congratulations on the birth of your little daughter Max! There is nothing like the birth of a new child to restore hope to the world.

I have read about your pledge. I sincerely hope that this money will make a difference, not just change hands. There are many good causes where your money can do miracles, and if you profit from your good deeds, it is absolutely fine with me. Whatever the critics say.

I understand that this is a done deal, and you have planned everything for the rest of your lifetime, but in case you change your mind, or in case some of your wealthy friends are looking for a good cause, there is one.

The Internet is a blessing. Uses of the Internet  are unlimited. Many people make a living off the internet and get wealthy, like you did.

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Jingle Bell Rock

Now this is fun! From blogging friend Julie Powell at juliepowell2014.wordpress.com.

Julz.......artist, blogger, photographer, graphic designer's avatarJulie Powell - Photographer & Graphic Artist

Time to admit a guilty little secret, I love the movie Mean Girls, It is silly and stupid and over the top, but there is something that speak to my inner teen………….so without further ado: Jingle Bell Rock from Mean Girls

–

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancing and prancing in jingle bell square
In the frosty air.

What a bright time, it’s the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go gliding in a one-horse sleigh
Giddy-up jingle horse, pick up your feet
Jingle around the clock
Mix and a-mingle in the jingling feet
That’s the jingle bell rock.

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowing and blowing up bushels of fun
Now the jingle hop has begun.
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell…

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Odi et amo (Zero)

So clever! If you love clever poetry, and who doesn’t? You will love Robertokaji.com

robert okaji's avatarO at the Edges

zero sign

Odi et amo (zero)

How I fear what you contain.
Reaching through,

I find only more you,
but when I multiply your being,

the result limits me.
I add myself to your body and obtain

only myself. If nothing is something,
how, what, may I claim?

Your beginning and end, a line
become circle, become identity.

I enter, and entering, depart.

zero MGD©

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Dreamlands

Powerful. Eurobrat.wordpress.com

eurobrat's avatareurobrat

Fading in and out, I wait for the bird of sleep to come and take me away with it.  I twist my head on the pillow and turn the radio up slightly, a murmur in the dark.

Finally, the bird swoops in and I glide away on its back.  Into the fog at first, then we circle over a lush green valley.  It’s beautiful.  In this valley, the woman found her husband and baby, their bellies carved open.  I look around, is that why this place is so empty?  Yes, the kidnapped girls were never found…there’s not a trace of them….

Oh, no!  I say.  What can we do about this?  The bird’s eyes are big and sad.  We have to understand, it says, that we cannot bomb our way out of this situation.  So in that case…?  The bird bows its head and weeps as it says, perhaps, economic…

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Forty Winks

we slept through the longest night
van winkle-like
forty years or forty winks?

yesterday we were young
unweathered
unfettered
maybe it was long ago
i can’t tell anymore

would we do it again
knowing what we know now?

ask us again
in another
forty years.